By the Grace of Me, Myself, and I

For nearly one-hundred years, people in recovery have been walking into dimly lit churches, sitting in metal folding chair and announcing their unfortunate circumstance, “Hi, I’m…. and I’m an addict.”

And that works for some people, but for most people… it doesn’t. For those in early sobriety trying to find resources that work for their recovery that aren’t faith based can be daunting. Alcoholics Anonymous is often touted as the end-all-be-all by so many people — both in recovery and not. Luckily, for those of us who feel apathetic towards twelve step programs there are other solutions.

Medication:

It took me approximately eight months to quit drinking from the time I verbalized my desire to. In that time span I began prepping to wean myself off. I was seeing a psychiatrist who prescribed me Naltrexone. It is commonly used to treat opioid and alcohol addictions; It works by blocking the affects of opioids but it is unclear how it works with alcohol addiction. In my personal experience, Naltrexone didn’t make my drunk feel any different, but after taking it for about two weeks I noticed I wanted to drink less. It was essentially stripping away my cravings to drink. To be clear, I was still drinking while taking Naltrexone but I wasn’t drinking as much. This way, I could gradually begin to taper myself off and ensure a much safer withdrawal when I did eventually quit drinking. Using Naltrexone was one of the many ways I practiced harm reduction in order to get sober; I stopped taking it around the same time I successfully quit drinking. If you are interested in taking Naltrexone or other medications to aid in your recovery, please speak with your physician or psychiatrist about any questions and concerns you have.

Therapy. Lots of therapy!

I have been seeing the same therapist since I was fifteen years old — that’s over ten years now! I lucked out pretty well as she has worked closely with addiction throughout her career and understands me better than anyone. Alongside continuing my normal therapy schedule twice monthly, I joined a recovery support group led by another licensed therapist. In each session, both individual and group, I am uncovering more layers of myself and putting together the pieces of my puzzle. Maybe psychotherapy is right for you, or techniques like cognitive behavioral therapy or dialectal behavior therapy both of which are beneficial for addiction recovery; Specialized addiction therapy is another option, resources like Monument or a specific therapist is yet another option for those in recovery. There are no shortage of therapies to try.

Support Groups:

All negatives of A.A aside, having access to a community of people who intimately understand what you’re going through is unparalleled. Luckily, there are virtual and in person groups for sober and sober-curious individuals. At the start of the pandemic, while I was trying to quit drinking, sober-focused Instagram pages were popping up in handfuls. Some of the pages I turned to for community and additional support were @sobergirlsociety, @shestayssober, and @sober_otter. Now two years later there are more pages offering a plethora of resources such as community meet ups, podcasts, sober coaching and more! There are pages specific to cities, like @soberinseattle or @queersoberatlanta. Point is, if you need community.. it’s out there. There is strength in numbers!

Secular Based Programs:

Maybe, you’re interested in the process of the twelve steps and being around likeminded individuals weekly, if not daily, but cannot get past the faith based approach that Alcoholics Anonymous takes. If that’s the case, there are secular (not spiritual or religious) programs such as SMART Recovery, LifeRing, Moderation Management, HAMS- Harm Reduction for Alcohol, Women for Sobriety plus more. As I mentioned above, I was attempting abstinence at the heat of the pandemic and wasn’t able to attend in-person meetings but found a workbook for Getting Sober Without God which included a compiled list of Practical Twelve Steps which, for an atheist or agnostic, made working through them easier. There was zero mention of a higher power, all of the verbiage was person based.

Maybe you adopt each of these resources, or maybe you take only one with you. Either way, there are always more options than the main one we are often presented with. If anyone tries to make you believe your recovery isn’t valid because you’re not in A.A — especially if that person isn’t in recovery themselves — tell them to f*ck off (or take a hike, which is known to be the more appropriate response).